How to Write a Sympathy Card
A sympathy card is a nice way to offer support and express your condolences to people who are suffering a loss. You can send a sympathy card even if you did not know the deceased if you are close to members of that person’s family, or if you were close to the deceased but don’t have a relationship with his or her family members. The point of the card is to express to those who are grieving that you are there to help support them if they need it.
You should begin by addressing the card to a specific person. If you did not know the deceased but are close to someone in the family, address the card to the person who you are close to. If you were close to the deceased but did not know that person’s family, then you should address the card to the person’s spouse (if they had one), their oldest child, then to a sibling.
Keep your opening thoughts simple. You’re trying to deliver a message, not win a writing contest. Avoid flowery prose and get right to the point. For example, “I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am for your loss” is short, to the point, and sincere. If you knew the deceased, write about a fond memory that you have of them. If you did not know the deceased, focus on the person who you are writing to. Let them know that you support them, and that you are thinking of them.
If you are offering help, be specific about what you can provide. “Let me know if there is anything that I can do to help” is a very nice sentiment, but is said so often that people are not likely to take you up on it for fear of imposing. Outlining exactly what you are able to offer, “Let me know if you need a break from cooking and I’ll bring you over a casserole” or “If you need some time alone I can watch your kids for an afternoon,” will make it easier for your friend to accept your help.
Conclude with a simple sentence that reiterates your support. “My thoughts are with you and your family.”
Be sure to write legibly so that your message is easy to read, and limit your card to 3 short paragraphs.
Don’t get too hung up on the details. The most important part of sending a sympathy card is to let someone know that you’re thinking of them while they are going through a difficult time. They will appreciate that you’ve taken the time to express your condolences and will likely be comforted that you thought of them during their time of grief.
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